Monday, November 30, 2009
Adjusting back again
It's cold and rainy today which doesn't seem to sooth the dull aches and sadness that seem to accompany returning back into the routine and off of vacation.
Sometimes days just don't quite go as you expect.
I lost my 3 year old today....
I was out scrambling to find a gift for my niece. Yes, I was stressed, my mind was full of things I needed to get done and on top of it all I found myself and my 3 boys driving off to the craft store.
"Why didn't I do this sooner?" "Why do I always wait until the last minute to do these things?"
After spending way too long going from aisle to aisle, staring at every possible option while trying to sooth my 1 year old and keep my other two boys from playing cars with the ink pads, I finally made a decision...well almost. Just one more thing to check, then I turn around and Peter is gone. Warren (the one who is supposed to be the most responsible but still too young to even grasp why) has no idea where he is. I fight back the panic that is slowly welling up inside. "Everything's going to be fine." "I'm sure he's right here.."
no answer. I'm starting to get slightly more frantic but trying to suppress my desire to ditch my other two kids and run around screaming Peter's name. I look at the sympathetic women at the register who begin looking around as well... still nothing.
"Peter!" (getting much more nervous now)...
No answer...finally not knowing what to do I just stood there for a moment and in he walks. His eyes red from crying. I hug him and all the stress I was feeling just seems to fade. A few moments later I discover that he had followed another woman out of the store thinking it was me or that I was out there somewhere and then didn't know what to do.
Some days are definitely harder than others...